I created a game, kinda. It comes of the back of reading bullshit lists like this one. That list gives the bored quarantiner 11 things to do when they’ve already done everything. And it lacks total imagination – the writer lists things like read a book. Oh, really, I should read? No shit. It lists video games twice if you include the Animal Crossing entry. Jesus fucking Christ, somebody got paid to write this! Do you honestly think people haven’t already tried reading, or played video games, or watched TV?! People click on that list because they are out of ideas, not because they need to be told to watch TV. Anyway, rant over.
One good thing came out of that list. That list was so annoyingly creative bankrupt click bait, that it inspired me to think out of the box… “Let’s make a board game!”
“How?” My flat mate asked, “We don’t have any cardboard.”
I looked at four unused wooden chairs in the dining area. CHAIRGAME.
The game is basically an amalgam of snakes and ladders and monopoly. And yes, of course it is a drinking game.
We didn’t have any markers at first, and an ordinary pen isn’t gunna work on wood, so we had to yell at our neighbours one floor up for one. We also don’t have a ruler so I used the edge of a Malteasers box…
Anyway, it wasted a full night of quarantine, and the next day I had a banging hangover. Great success!
So here’s an idea yer not gunna get from some half assed quarantine things-to-do-list on CNET. You don’t even need dice. There are like 50,000 dice apps on the App Store. All you need is a wooden chair, a marker, and a malt eaters box. And a pen, paper, and scissors if yer gunna include some community chest like cards, like so.
The squares are made up of my friends and my embarrassing, stupid, drunken moments. If it’s positive one, you go forward a certain amount of acquires. If it’s negative, you go back. Simple.
I haven’t thought of a name for the game yet. I might stick with Chair Game. I like the simplicity of it. Fuck you, creatively bankrupt writers.