Thoughts on the Tenet Trailer

This week saw the trailer release of Tenet, Christopher Nolan’s follow up to 2017’s Dunkirk, Nolan’s most straight forward movie. Naturally, this film’s gotta balance the books with extra confusing, reality altering, exposition epilepsy. The two and a half minutes reveals nothing, being extra secretive, but in doing so makes for an underwhelming trailer.

What does the Tenet trailer tell us about the plot of the movie? Fuck all. It’s about time travel, but not. The 2.5 mins is full of average action scenes with exhausting explanations about time travel… yup, it’s a Christopher Nolan film. Do you think Nolan thinks time-travel is a dirty word? Every line of dialogue of the trailer is basically, “THIS IS NOT TIME TRAVEL, THIS IS NOT TIME TRAVEL.”

I have a lot of questions about Tenet, but not questions regarding plot. Questions like, why is Robert Pattinson using a fake posh British accent when he already has a posh British accent? It sounds so weird. And is Michael Caine happy just playing Alfred in every single film? Even films outside of his work with Nolan, he’s turns up and does his Alfred-thing. I never even enjoyed Michael Caine as Alfred in the first place, and now I have to see it everywhere.

Why does there have to be so many brawls in Nolan’s movies? They are mind-numbingly boring fist fights. Nolan has always been so ahead of the curve in filmmaking, but he has never been able to direct fighting well, and it’s so prevalent in all his movies. These days there is amazing fighting choreography in films, but Nolan’s stuck in the past. Punch, dodge, punch, dodge, *yawns and looks at watch.*

These are the questions I have. I wish I had questions about the plot or who the characters are, but I wasn’t given enough information to be interested. There’s more exposition in this trailer than there are in most feature length films, and the exposition are word salads that make no sense out of context. I guess it’s hard to cut a good trailer together when you’re trying to keep so many details hidden. Despite the trailer, I’m still looking forward to Tenet. It’s something new, and I feel like we haven’t had anything new in years.

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